The Workday Reading: May 19, 2017

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1) How to stay positive in a toxic work environment. (Career Contessa)

2) If this pore extracting pomegranate mask works, I’ll take a lifetime supply.

3) The truth is out about Instagram, and users are over “the algorithm.” (Daily Mail; HuffPo)

4) H&M Must Haves: A sunny yellow dress, a printed v-neck blouse, and knot-front shorts.

5) The right way to make friends at work. (Business Insider)

6)  Try rocking the one-piece with this green high neck and hot red suit from Aerie.

7) Are childish men the reason women are having children later? And why you shouldn’t waste a woman’s time if you’re not sure you want to have children. (NY Post; Stuff)

8) M&S Must Haves: The perfect cardigan, a cute-casual red dress, a white, dipped-hem blouse.

9) How to diffuse conflicts at work. (The Everygirl)

10) This mini cinema lightbox is a fun, inexpensive gift.

11) What happens when feminism is no longer fashionable? (Closet Heroes)

12) New Store Alert! Check out these awesome heels and lace-up sandals from & Other Stories.

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What Blew My Mind. What 2,000 calories looks like at a restaurant vs. at home.

What My OCD Bought. Cord management sleeves and cable clips for my desk.

What I’m Done Watching. Just finished The Arrangement (bingeworthy).

What I’d Like to Learn. How to make a delicious pan sauce.

[image found here]

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11 Comment

  1. Reply
    Monica T.
    May 19, 2017 at 10:57 am

    Re: 7 – I was actually the one in my relationship delaying having children, even though I had found this similar socio-economic unicorn partner. The reality is that a woman gives up a lot when she has a child. Even with a supportive partner, it’s important to remember that the one going to all the doctors appointments is the mother, the one taking off months from work post-birth is the mother. And the systemic sexism we all face means that this can impact our career, even with a supportive workplace! I delayed because I wanted to be at a place where it wouldn’t make a difference if I had to rest on my laurels for a few years. I needed to be salary so I could work flex days and work when I could work and take care of my child when I needed to. Women without a supportive partner, or a supportive workplace, well I don’t know how they do it. I had a plan, and motherhood has still been one of the toughest challenges of my life.
    Re: 11 – Feminism isn’t a t-shirt, so once the slogan t-shirt isn’t fashionable anymore I guess we’ll have to go back to it being a struggle and a cause, without any credit or recognition being doled out for being one, or proclaiming oneself to be one.

    1. Reply
      Belle
      May 21, 2017 at 1:27 am

      My concern is that once that t-shirts disappear, younger women will start to believe what so many already believe, that feminism isn’t necessary anymore.

      1. Reply
        Monica T.
        May 22, 2017 at 1:14 pm

        This is true. We can only hope they grow up and understand why it’s necessary, and have more experienced women holding the torch until they get there.

  2. Reply
    M
    May 19, 2017 at 11:40 am

    Report back on #2!

  3. Reply
    Addie
    May 19, 2017 at 2:26 pm

    I found the article about why men who don’t want children shouldn’t waste women’s time incredibly annoying. Men who don’t want children should absolutely be honest about their desires. But if a woman finds out she’s in this situation or decides to pursue a man even after he’s told her this, the onus is not on him to continually remind the woman that her time is running out and ask if she’s sure she still wants to be with him.

    I also recently read an open letter to pastors about how mothers are acknowledged in church on Mothers Day and I went on to read the comments. There were so many women saying it was the most humiliating experience of their lives (to not be able to stage with the other mothers) and how they were still grappling with the fact that “God had chosen not to bless them with a child.” Maybe this is a matter of vastly different ways of looking at life, but I think it’s wrong to blame God for not getting something you wanted if you just kept waiting for it happen in a specific way. If you’re infertile or past child bearing years and still single, or you got divorced, or whatever reason you didn’t have your own children, there are other ways to become a mother. The question is how badly you want it. I say all this as a women who isn’t out of time yet, but also isn’t in a relationship, so having children is way down the road for me. But I’ve wanted to be a mother essentially my entire life. I can’t recall a time when I wasn’t absolutely sure of that fact. If I never get married and decide artificial insemination isn’t for me, then I’ll become a foster mother. It’s true that life isn’t fair and sometimes crappy things just happen. But sometimes you just have to fight for what you want.

    1. Reply
      Mary
      May 22, 2017 at 11:08 am

      My husband and I wanted to have children young, and we started TTC when we were in our early 20’s, so I certainly didn’t wait until I was past my prime. I’m almost 40 now. We have only tried preventing a few months in the last 18 years, and I have never been pregnant. Let me just say that even when you are open to becoming a mother in however it happens, when it doesn’t happen easily, it still sucks. I am a mother via foster adoption, and I am very grateful for my son. Yes, sometimes you just have to fight for what you want, but you have to be prepared to lose a lot of battles no matter how you want it. It sounds simple until you’re in the trenches. So maybe instead of saying that people just have to fight for what they want, you could listen to their stories and acknowledge that, yeah, sometimes, it just sucks.

  4. Reply
    MK
    May 19, 2017 at 7:17 pm

    If you’re looking for cord management for your commute/travel, I LOVE my grid it and grip ties. They keep my purse from feeling like a nest of cords. Especially a life saver on flights!

  5. Reply
    Kate
    May 19, 2017 at 8:52 pm

    love your pick for H&M site.

  6. Reply
    geri
    May 22, 2017 at 3:13 pm

    thank you for the link love!

  7. Reply
    B
    May 25, 2017 at 9:42 am

    Hi Abra,

    I’d appreciate it if you’d read the following article on Buzzfeed:

    https://www.buzzfeed.com/jeanlucbouchard/things-people-dont-understand-about-ocd?utm_term=.qhR3AxL8M8#.hdY8jdlDBD

    It talks about what OCD is and the suffering that it causes. As someone who has actually been diagnosed with OCD and has to deal with the real implications of it on a daily basis, I’d appreciate it if it was not trivialized regularly by society. People that have mental illnesses like OCD, Schizophrenia, Tourette’s Syndrome, etc feel a sting when people make light of something that is so hard to deal with. I know that you aren’t trivializing it deliberately, but I just wanted to bring attention to this issue.

    1. Reply
      Belle
      May 25, 2017 at 11:12 am

      I appreciate that, it was not my intention to make light of your suffering, but I can understand how in the common usage, these jokes, do.

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